#sage

"When in Doubt [10w] If your relationship becomes stagnant,set fire to her dress."

"Sometimes God is Drunk [10w] Satan's sudden appearance means God is on a drinking binge."

"McDonald's I love and rescue stray dogs, duct tape Burger King crowns to their heads and set them loose in McDonald's."

"Soar Like a Pigeon [10w] Better be a pigeon than an eagle with Indians around."

"Be Careful What You Wish For More often than not,a dream come true is a nightmare-in-the-making."

"Comfort Zone Your comfort zone has a clock on it, ticking off until it becomes your death zone."

"Lady Clowns [10w] Lady clowns drip menstrual blood in seven luscious rainbow colors."

"Hung [10w] Being caught with your pants down is a hanging offense."

"Casualties of War The casualties of war are far, far morethan those lying dead on the battlefield floor."

"Eyes of Heaven To see through the eyes of heavenis to look upon your fellow manand only see the good in him."

"BFF, My Ass ~ It's a Jungle Out There! About one-third of all marriages are procured by sabotaging your best friend's happiness."

"Past/Present/Future I have no problem living in the present,but because of my pastpeople want to kill me in the future."

"Ruminating Poetry A poem should be eaten in one sittingbut regurgitated often like a ruminant's food."

"Now, I'm Not Born Yet [10w] I brought a sundial to a flight crossing the International-Date-Line."

"Wretched [10w] Intelligence without compassion is an invitation to a wretched life."

"Illinois State Motto State sovereignty, national union.Life begins and ends with corruption."

"Don’t Let the Dead Fish Fool You [10w] Even the eyes of a dead fish can reflect light."

"Beating the Language Like a Tom-Tom with a Mohawk "Actually, you will receive a free pre-owned gift with every purchase,irregardless of the awesome enormity of your stupidity."

"Poets Job Description [10w] Poets console the soul with words and eyes with images."

"Hearts Hearts of hope and of promiseHearts filled with dreams and whim,These are the hearts of loversUnguarded,Standing out on a limb.Hearts unmended and brokenHearts scarred to stone and steel,These are the hearts of loversArmored,Being unable to feel."