#sage

"Long Term Relationships [10w] Long term relationships should begin and end with a laugh."

"Fate [10w] The eternal point where our dreams intersect is called fate."

"What's in it for me?' A selfish person doesn't become compassionate as the result of some words of wisdom or epiphany. The selfish need selfish reasons to act unselfish."

"Witticisms The greatest reward for coming up with some witty turn of phraseis that some day, if you're lucky,it may wind up in a fortune cookieat the very Chinese restaurant you're eating in!But if you get a big head about it,know it wasn't the flattery,it was the MSG."

"Unruffled [10w] Nothing’s calmer than an unruffled duck eating a cool cucumber."

"Income Tax [10w] A man's income tax return measures his integrity and stupidity."

"Celebrity [10w] Celebrity seeking is like love or war: NO HOLDS BARRED."

"Mythbusters [10w] Snipers will assure you safety in numbers is a myth."

"Children and Food [10w] Once children order like grown-upsfood's lost its sweet innocence."

"Sex Kitchens of the Future [10w] Her entire kitchen was made of silicone ~ including her breasts."

"Glow in the Dark "You've led me from stark nightwith a love that glows in the dark."

"Eyes of Heaven To see through the eyes of heavenis to look upon your fellow manand only see the good in him."

"Ode to a Wastepaper Basket I love the way you sit in the corner,gracious like a lover,catching my every crumpled vanity."

"Kansas State Motto Ad astra per aspera. [9]Flat land and flatline intelligence."

"Cheeky Poets [10w] Remember 'poetry' lies between 'pitiful' and 'poop' in the dictionary."

"Voodoo I'm phobic about pins and needles.Can I just stick a voodoo doll in the microwave?"

"Speak to the Head [10w] + {Couplet} Tis of no fucking availTo speak to the tail."

"Prevailing Wins [10w] Truth prevails in private, bullshit in public, integrity in spirit."

"My Fathers Last Words My dad was a sadist and whorehound.His last words were,'Son, I have a million dollars hidden in the."

"What is the Meaning of Life? [10w] {6} To be transformed into all we are capable of becoming."