#self-esteem-self-help-book

"Southern Cat on a Hot Tin Roof Sure nuff, I'm happier than a cat on a formerly hot tin roofwhich now usesNXT Cool Zone® heat reflecting roof coating ~but I'm still ornier than a mule on loco weedand a whole lot hornier than a two-dicked billy goat.You gots any coatin' for dat?"

"California Milk Processor Board: Got Milk?... ...cuz I got a fucking hangover."

"Socrates [10w] "I know less than you.That's how smart I am!"

"Goat Fucking for Dummies You gently fuck a female goat ~you got to ram the malesto make any progress."

"A Prayer God, be my light in pitch-black night;Show me the path from wrong to rightThat I might in Your hands be delivered later,Having eclipsed myself to become something greater."

"Man vs. Chimp Even chimpanzees are toolmakers,but only man has the unique honor of being a Godmaker."

"Thai-kus From the dark starfishof the 300 Baht whoremy white sperm bubbles.Reclining BuddhaBirds nest in your golden ears.What wisdom they hear."

"ᏰέƦẙḽԃṏሁ Լέῳ [10w] II ᏰέƦẙḽԃṏሁ Լέῳ accounts for 15.7% of all Hello Poetry's pageviews."

"David Dukes How come everytime I put on the T.V.to watch some Dick Wolf crime show,all the judges are blackand all the criminals are white!I just sayin there must be some kindaJew conspiracy at work here!"

"Gained in Translation [10w] In timeless truths there's more gained than lost in translation."

"♥ Love ♡ My heart skips a beat every time you walk through the door!It isn't love ~ I have an arrhythmia."

"UPS [10w] Women at work judge the UPS man by his package."

"Eye of God [10w] The Hubble-Universe is a microchip in the Eye of God."

"Six-Pack [10w] A six-pack of beer's inversely proportional to six-pack of abs."

"Gypsy When one gypsy spits on you, its disgusting;when two do, it's suspicious;when three do, you're late to a gypsy wedding."

"Publisher's Persuasion "You're much too good a writer to want a six figure advance. You don't want your readers to think you're only writing for money ~ do you?"

"you=""are=""what=""eat"=""[10w]=""That's why I've become a pizza with a pussy topping."

"Knowledge vs. Wisdom [10w] + [10w] Knowledge is the understanding that you are what you eat. Wisdom is not eating a pussy with hair on it."

"The Written Word The only thing I hold dearer than myself(and my moms, yo') ~is the written word.I'd give my life for that bitch, (yo'.)"

"Hate Recycle Bin When you empty your hate recycle binit frees up more memory to write even better poetry.Just try it and tell me this isn't true!"