#self-esteem-self-help-book

"Tapestry [10w] Life's a tapestry of mystery and miracles quilted by God."

"Rice-a-Roni: The San Francisco treat... ...the other treat, of course, being anal penetration."

"Double-Dipping [10w] Double-dip in righteousness and delight in the here and herafter."

"Tickled Pink Today,without thinking,I filled my half-empty fish tank, to its brink.Having doubled the size of his universe,my Siamese bettais quite tickled pinkThe same thing happens when you fill my half-empty world with your love.Bai, keep pourin'!"

"Revel in the Unraveling Being authentic is lifting the maskon who you think you should be seen as,and becoming at ease with your bare ass vulnerability.Revel in the unraveling,take courage in sharing your imperfections,and you'llincrease your loveexponentially."

"Love vs. Mental Illness [10w] Love, like mental illness, comes on graduallyand then suddenly."

"Got Hate? When a hater cozily whispers shit in your ear about them,what does that say about you?"

"Free Lunch There's no such thing as a free lunch ~for people who haven't yet learned to beat the system ;)"

"Let's Face It [10w] If you've peed on enough fire hydrants, you're a dog."

"California Haiku "After my boob jobI'm taking acting lessons.Fuck's fifty, no anal."

"Selfies [10w] Selfies allows you instant gratification and reminiscence all at once."

"Love [10w] Love is a time machineset to your perfect present"

"Bagels and Lox Life's an everything bagel;love is a schmear of scallion cream cheese;and lox, no matter how you cut it,is resistant to dumbass metaphors."

"Now [10w] + {Couplet} Whether you Hurry up! or P r o c r a s t i n a t e,the NOW doesn't discriminate."

"Love on Fire [10w] A man in love cannot see fire or smell smoke."

"Cinco de Mayo [10w] What day do the dead party to celebrate the living?"

"Scientifically Proven [10w] Mariah Carey has a brain the size of a walnut."

"Myself [10w] "I don't really know myself;he's only a tenuous acquaintance."

"Revenge [10w] Revenge is a long game;all you need is time."

"Visual Pun [10w] Example of visual pun:cloud shaped like a banana peel."