#self-improvement-book

"BMW: The ultimate driving machine... ...just like our gas chambers were the ultimate killing machines."

"Winning vs. Losing [10w] Too often the cost of winning is losing your soul."

"Cleverness vs. Crime [10w] Being caught's the only difference between cleverness and crime."

"A Poem Should Be Motionless A poem should be motionlessin its eternal truthsand animated to inspire latent words into action."

"Memory Foam [10w] She had an ass like an elephants memoryfoam pillow."

"Clairol 2: Hair color so natural only her hairdresser knows for sure... ...but he's gay and already Tweeted it to 300 people."

"Over [10w] It's never ever over because the fat lady can't sing."

"Want vs. What's Coming to You As the Rolling Stones say,You can't always get what you want ~but God will always give you what's coming to you."

"Pain vs. Pleasure {Couplet} Pain and pleasure are nearly identical,the difference lies in their temporal perception.Pleasure feels fleeting, pain feels unending;both jolt us at the nerve's first inception."

"Love Poetry [10w] Love poetry is simply bleeding on the page with ink."

"Carlsberg: Probably the best lager in the world... ...just like IKEA is the best furniture on earth."

"Hug [10w] To embrace what you truly love,give it a hug."

"Who, Me? We marry nearly the same person over and over again,hoping next time they'll get it right."

"A Prayer God, be my light in pitch-black night;Show me the path from wrong to rightThat I might in Your hands be delivered later,Having eclipsed myself to become something greater."

"Frivolous Gossip and Poetry It's just so much frivolous gossip to dwell upon the moral merits of a poet;what should only concern the reader is the merit of his words.Leave moral judgments to the preachers and aesthetic judgments to the critical readers."

"Poetry as Entertainment [10w] Poetry that's not entertaining is just a self-indulgent laundry list."

"McDonald's I love and rescue stray dogs, duct tape Burger King crowns to their heads and set them loose in McDonald's."

"What's a Proper Tribute to Robin Williams? [10w] When funnymen die is to better to laugh or cry?"

"A Suicide's Regret "I cut my vein in vain;blood slowly oozes out.I should've cut an arteryand watch it spurt and spout."

"Poets Hate Poets [10w] Poets hate poets who are more talented than they are."