#self-improvement-book

"Prayer [10w] Despite God's grace, prayer is not a wish granting well."

"McDonald's I love and rescue stray dogs, duct tape Burger King crowns to their heads and set them loose in McDonald's."

"Children and Food [10w] Once children order like grown-upsfood's lost its sweet innocence."

"The Tragedy of Forgetfulness When you stop loving someone,in order to heal your memory of them begins to fade.Unfortunately, the good ones fade with the bad and suddenlyyears of your life have disappeared."

"Harlem P.O.V. Everything outside Harlem's the boondocks,where hayseeds opt out of Nikes for Reeboks."

"Kaddish Kaddish for Mrs. Ginsbergis not Kaddish,For your mom raised a Buddhistand mine raised a Jew.You'll zazen for your loss,I'll daven for mine.I do not belittle your loss,your grief is no less than mine.But by abandoning your tribe, אלון,Who now will say Kaddish for you?"

"Biggest Problem with 10w [10w] The biggest problem with aphorisms is people believe they're true."

"Loneliness [10w] Loneliness is GPS equipped new Mercedeswith nowhere to go.****************"

"Small Packages [10w] Great things come in small packages from a geological perspective."

"Self-Sufficiency [10w] When God closes a door,buy a Sawzall from Home Depot."

"Cumin vs. Acumen Cumin is a powerful spice with a nutty peppery flavor;Acumen is more about having the good taste to knowhow and when to use it."

"Oxford, England Haiku City shrouded in fogand within the blinding mist we found each other."

"My Sweet Home, Alabama If it grows, it sticks, if it crawls, it bites,if it's outside, it rusts,if it's ornery, it fights,if it's a dawg, it barks.if its a possum, it feignsif it's a buggy, it squeals,if it's winter, it's summer,If it's slimy, it's eels.If it ain't Dixie, it won't do,so let's fix to get piss drunkand lynch us another nigger and Jew."

"The Great Blue of the Great Blue A Great Blue whale mourns her hunted mate.Her heart, once the size of an SUV,lonely rides the empty sea,her heart's now withered to subcompact class,her whys and wherefores, run out of gas."

"Marriage Material For women seeking a marriage partner,a man's sense of humor trumps good looks.Unfortunately for the funnymen out there,security trumps laughter."

"Lubbock, Texas Haiku Oil wells, Hub of the Plains.Stinks like an armpit."

"Jew in a Canoe Haiku Jew in a canoe,whitewater rushes, the canoe tips.The Jew doesn't."

"The Albanian Art of Subtle Seduction [10w] "You have an amazing mind now show me your tits."

"Advice for Women at Starbucks If a vanilla latte and banana nut muffin doesn't solve the problem,perhaps you're going at it wrong."

"Legacy To leave a legacy,you first gotta leave your leg in the door."