#spiritual-wisdom

"FBI vs. CIA When a person works for the FBI for 20 years and retires,he gets a watch.When a person works for the CIA for 20 years and retires,he gets watched.I know this not because I'm in law enforcement or with the NSA ~I know this because I have HBO."

"New Age Advertising ATTEND OUR REINCARNATION RETREATGuaranteed to be a once in a lifetime experience.Sure it costs $5000, but lets face it,you only live once."

"Winning vs. Losing [10w] Too often the cost of winning is losing your soul."

"Taste [10w] + [10w] "If you have sophisticated taste, you like what I like.If you're a Neanderthal, you will love what I hate."

"Breaking with Tradition is Tradition You can take the poem outside of tradition,but you can't take tradition out of the poem."

"No That's Bad Aim Shoot!That ass clown couldn't hit the broad side of a barnwith the smart photon torpedohe lifted from Area 51."

"Spooning [10w] Love means tasting her spaghetti sauce on a wooden spoon."

"Gained in Translation [10w] In timeless truths there's more gained than lost in translation."

"Yams vs. Sweet Potatoes vs. Cassava vs. Popeye [10w] "I am that I am that I am a yam."

"Tofino, Canada Haiku Free flowing clothes,Strumming guitar on the beach.Still my baggage follows me."

"Love is enough."

"Double-Dipping [10w] Double-dip in righteousness and delight in the here and herafter."

"Birds [10w] When a bird wakens, flight is no longer a dream."

"Carlsberg: Probably the best lager in the world... ...just like IKEA is the best furniture on earth."

"Crying in the Rain If you cry in the raindoes anybody but you know you're unhappy?"

"The Written Word The only thing I hold dearer than myself(and my moms, yo') ~is the written word.I'd give my life for that bitch, (yo'.)"

"Self-Sufficiency [10w] When God closes a door,buy a Sawzall from Home Depot."

"Soulmate My Ass [10w] Aspire to marry the person the least wrong for you."

"Government Intrusion [10w] + {Couplet} America's biggest illusion is the beliefthey're free from government intrusion."

"Marriage [10w] The only thing better than forgiveness in marriage is forgetfulness."