Beryl Dov

"Doldrums People who live in the doldrumscan't throw caution to the wind."

"Tennessee State Motto Agriculture and Commerce.Where the KKK was bornand the most popular pick up line is, 'Nice tooth!"

"UPS [10w] Women at work judge the UPS man by his package."

"Alaska State Motto North to the Future.We got highest rape and STD-rate in the nation."

"Dressed to Kill [10w] At fashionable parties,vegetarians should not be dressed to kill."

"When Old Age Begins Old age seizes center stagewhen more people we love are amidst the deadthan amongst the living."

"Be Careful What You Wish For More often than not,a dream come true is a nightmare-in-the-making."

"Diana Sporting a Remington Sendero SF II {Couplet} Over one shoulder hung a rifle, over the other swung a brace of pheasants;She was a no-nonsense breed of sniper, a viper with no time for fangs of conscience."

"Jesus [10w] "Sorry to keep you hanging,but it's just our nature."

"Freedom [10w] You've never experienced freedom until you have nothing to lose."

"The AP Stylebook is Useless {Couplet} I can't abbreviate abbreviation nor know how to initialize an acronym,I can find the contraction for contraction nor the précis for a homonym."

"Object of Desire A woman knows she's the object of a unknown man's desirelike a game animal becoming aware it is being looked at."

"The Game Is Afoot God's buried eight jewels within my soul.Life's game is,'Remove each gem, yet find me whole.'The clue is,"Eight is one, and one is eight,no jewel's more precious,all equally great."

"Past is Past [10w] Lovers should clearly avoid obsessing about each other's romantic past."

"Overheard at Ashtanga Yoga Class *"I don't know my he left me. I even had a rabbit's food hanging from my dreamcatcher.""Maybe you should've used a little more suction and a few less amulets."

"Vacations for Souls [10w] When souls are bored in Heaven they vacation in Hell."

"A Real Passionate Kiss Should Feel Like Dying [10w] Like ice melting into water coming to a rolling boil."

"Animal Species Identity [10w] Funny how animals know their own species without a mirror."

"Hermits vs. Rising Real Estate Costs [10w] Hermits can no longer afford a cabin in the woods."

"Bespeckled Heroes [10w] Great heroes in 100 years become statues speckled with birdshit."