More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I'm here at The Container Store looking for something large enough to hold all my love for her. It's a flood, so I hope they sell Shipping Container Ships."
"Are all caps really necessary? No need to shout at me. My hearing is perfect when the words arrive in my mind through my eyes."
"If I told you I’ve worked hard to get where I’m at, I’d be lying, because I have no idea where I am right now."
"A circular table that spins around is a great way to make a romantic dinner for two with three people less awkward. I’ll pay for myself, I promise."
"I loved her as long as a midget. It was gruesome, and then I grew some."