More quotes by Jarod Kintz, I Want

"I want to see an elephant hunt down a man for the sole purpose of collecting his teeth, while a chorus of typewriters sings songs that praises the bananas for their wisdom, leadership, and their high levels of potassium."
"I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair."
"I want to create a seventeen-syllable word that encompasses the human condition, and then use that word to form the world’s most perfect haiku."
"I want to get the words "Courage"and "Bravery"tattooed across my back, so people could associate me with those things as they read them while they chase me."
"I want to write my own eulogy, and I want to write it in Latin. It seems only fitting to read a dead language at my funeral."