More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I want to go to sleep in my time machine and wake up eight hours in the future."
"I used to gorge on gorgeous women, but now I look for things that can’t be seen with the eyes, but are only detected by the heart. This is love."
"Everyone’s different, and in that way everyone’s the same. Stand out by sitting down. Try my love seat—it’s made for two people, so you can be comfortably obese."
"If someone invited you to a flash mob, would you wear a bra?"
"To be invisible, paint yourself with the direct shade of zero. Leave nothing to chance, by taking nothing with you wherever you go."