"She says he says, but she could be lying to me, and he could be lying to her, so I can’t believe her, even if I could believe her."
"Writers fish for the right words like fishermen fish for, um, whatever those aquatic creatures with fins and gills are called."
"Nobody can make you feel ignorant but you—the you from before, the one who skipped school and slept in class. By you, of course, I mean me."
"I’d rather fake my own fog, than fake a steamy love scene. Can I interest you in some mist? It’s homemade."
"She says he says, but she could be lying to me, and he could be lying to her, so I can’t believe her, even if I could believe her."
"I love like a leaf in the wind. Please, hold your applause until the end of the performance (the last day of fall)."