To me, beer tastes like piss. Maybe that's why I only enjoy... - Jarod Kintz, It Occurred to Me
"To me, beer tastes like piss. Maybe that's why I only enjoy it in the shower with my uncle."
More quotes by Jarod Kintz, It Occurred to Me
"If flowers were boogers, I'd pick a few big ones and flick them on your grave."
"I like my relationships like I like my eggs. Over easy."
"My advice for a person who's just fallen out of a skyscraper window is, Flap your arms...faster."
"The mouth is made for communication, and nothing is more articulate than a kiss."
"When a girl says she wants to be friends with benefits, I always ask if that includes dental insurance."