#Dating

"We had a whirlwind romance. That’s what happens when you date a tornado. Hold on, I have to stop tweeting for a bit because Kansas keeps calling."

"Sometimes we assume that the new person in our life is better for us because they are totally different from the last person we dated. Only later do we see that we have chosen a different version of the same thing and they both leave us unsatisfied."

"And since I’m marrying into the Quartet, I have certain privileges and duties. If you’re sleeping with Laurel—”“I’m not sleeping with Laurel. We’re dating.”“Right, and the two of you are just going to hold hands, admire the moon, and sing camp songs.”“For a while. Minus the singing."

"Here's something else to think about: calling when you say you're going to is the very first brick in the house you are building of love and trust. If he can't lay this one stupid brick down, you ain't never gonna have a house baby, and it's cold outside."

"There’s nothing like that feeling of waiting for a guy. It’s the loneliest feeling in the world. Holding that cell phone in your hand as you take out the trash, use the bathroom, change the litter box. Fearful that the one second you aren’t looking will be when they call. Pathetic. And something I have done as recently as last week."

"Ordinarily, I am the person who falls in love quickly and somewhat inappropriately and then goes on to destroy what is a good thing. That's always been my style. So, you know: I get it. And I feel right now the way I imagine all those guys felt with me. And I have to say, for the first time in my life, I feel something approaching compassion for them."

"Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with."

"Friendship is not by force but by choice.You can never please everybody, he who aims to please everybody will end up pleasing nobody."

"You picked a lemon, throw it away lemonade is overrated. Freaks should remain at the circus, not in your apartment. You already have one asshole. You don’t need another. Make a space in your life for the glorious things you deserve. Have faith."

"Rejection is an opportunity for your selection."

"You know a relationship has deteriorated past the point of salvage when one person detests another's gestures."

"Don't leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and get it later; he may be with his real girlfriend."

"I'm about to make a wild, extreme and severe relationship rule: the word busy is a load of crap and is most often used by assholes. The word "busy"is the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. It seems like a good excuse, but in fact in every silo you uncover, all you're going to find is a man who didn't care enough to call. Remember men are never to busy to get what they want."

"Kindness is really important to me in finding my own prince - so are patience and a sense of humor. Without those qualities he's no Prince Charming!"

"Pretty soon the only people left without a girlfriend will be me and Wendell the school janitor, and he smells like windex.""At least you know he's still available."

"A squeegee is a sponge on a stick, and if there is a tangible item that’s more romantic, I don’t know what it is. Never go on a first date without one."

"When you loved someone and had to let them go, there will always be that small part of yourself that whispers, "What was it that you wanted and why didn't you fight for it?"

"Sometimes it takes a heartbreak to shake us awake & help us see we are worth so much more than we're settling for."

"Better to put your heart on the line, risk everything, and walk away with nothing than play it safe. Love is a lot of things, but “safe” isn’t one of them."

"I believe with all my heart that the cliches are true, that we are our own best friends and best company, and that if you're not right for yourself, it's impossible to be right for anyone."