#illogical

"I want to lose weight by eating nothing but moon pies, which have significantly less gravity than earthier foods such as fruits and vegetables."

"I don't want to work a 9-5 job, because 20 hours a day is just too much."

"To find out if she really loved me, I hooked her up to a lie detector. And just as I suspected, my machine was broken."

"I want to protect innocent people from sin by locking them in cages, where the evil can't get to them."