#master-key

"Office Depot: Taking Care of Business... ...with short breaks, bad management and no job advancement opportunities."

"American Foreign Policy [10w] Foreign Policy requires dealing from the bottom of the deck."

"♀ Travelers vs. ♀ Tourists [10w] + [10w] Female travelers wear no makeup, stringy jewelry and Jesus sandals.Female travelers wear overcaked makeup, diamond jewelry and Gucci Booties."

"Love and Blindness [10w] Love may be unilaterally blind,but divorce blinds both parties."

"Getting Even Bring a gun to a knife-fight,Bring a nuke to a war.Even if you don't win,You'll even the score.““”̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿’̿’̵͇̿̿з=(•̪ⓧ)=ε/̵͇̿̿/̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿"

"Err [10w] My dear, "To err is human — to forgive, to redefine."

"Income Tax [10w] A man's income tax return measures his integrity and stupidity."

"Jesus [10w] "Sorry to keep you hanging,but it's just our nature."

"Comedy vs. Satire [10w] Comedy pokes fun at society's self-inflation;satire deflates the balloon."

"Explosive Heart [10w] + {Couplet} A heart that's been playedcan become a hand grenade."

"Mood Swings 'ᏰέƦẙḽԃṏሁ's the most "unappreciated"poet on this site.Being "misunderstood"is what gets him into a fight.Now that I'm retired and free,He's the new "King"of HP ~Now I hate that Jew because he's better and right."

"Chutzpah {Limerick} Despite your unmitigated audacity,you're effrontery remains one of opacity.Let me suggest you turn Jewand learn chutzpah too,to realize your fullest capacity."

"Taco Bell [10w] Taco Bell: Living proof you can shit where you eat."

"Second Opinions My doctor told me I have pancreatic cancer and have 2 months to live.I asked him about getting a second opinion.The Doc said, 'No problem.'He thought for a second and said,'I think the Boston Red Sox are going to win the series again this year."

"Narcissist, Assholes and Immunization Narcissists and assholes are immunized by their egos and sense of entitlement against the criticisms, grievances and resentments of others."

"9/11 Haiku: Rudy Giuliani, Mayor of New York "Now you boxcutter, Iraqi Pete, camel fuckersreally pissed me off!"

"Read vs. Write If you want to know about life second hand, read;if you want to experience life directly, write."

"Pedestals [10w] People should not be placed on pedestals unless they're stuffed."

"Mongolian, Temeenii'malgai The small fuzzy hat worn by camels that cross the Gobi desert. Usually stolen by natives of Ulaanbaatar for the groom's hat at weddings. The fuzz on the hat smells so bad that the groom is temporarily blinded and can't see how ugly the bride looks until it's too late."

"Seafood My body's just a shell,the world is my oyster ~and I'm getting a whale of appetiteright now for some delicious seafood ."