#master-key

"Somalia Haiku For a Somalian, heaven's drawing water from a well in an earthen pot."

"Cancer [10w] It's odd that the cancer that kills you is you."

"Don't Mess with the Queen {Couplet} The first man harnessing the secrets of fireCannot compare with the revelation of your sovereign ire."

"Finally, I Know Who I Am You are what you eat.~ Ludwig Andreas FeuerbachWe become what we think about.~ Earl NightingaleI'm a Horny Pizza!"

"What is God? (60) [10w] God's always the correct answer once you rephrase the question."

"Children and Food [10w] Once children order like grown-upsfood's lost its sweet innocence."

"A Prayer God, be my light in pitch-black night;Show me the path from wrong to rightThat I might in Your hands be delivered later,Having eclipsed myself to become something greater."

"The 2-Step Self-Discovery Program The first step in self-discovery is not giving a shit what anybody else thinks.The second step is knowing you're a self-centered asshole."

"Bespeckled Heroes [10w] Great heroes in 100 years become statues speckled with birdshit."

"You Can't Win [10w] Every bitch is a witch;every wife brings you strife."

"Jealousy [10w] Jealousy's like being reprimanded for a crime you haven't committed."

"Trickeries, Sophistries and Traps [10w] Life's great irony is that we, the trapped,set traps."

"Fucking 3rd World Taxi Drivers [10w] Taxi drivers have ruined more vacations than tsunamis or earthquakes."

"The Stink of Hate {Couplet} When haters write they raise a stink;must be the venom coursing through their ink."

"Perfect Sex [10w] Perfects sex balances the conflicting pleasures of submission and mastery."

"Pamela Anderson Haiku Ben Stillerbeds Pamela Anderson.My alarm clock rings"

"A Voice from the Past A book is a voice from the past whispering into your ear.Sometime I get the urge to exhume the author's bodyand hit him in the head with a shovel."

"2D or Not 2D [10w] The best thing about a two-dimensional world is nobody's fat."

"Grateful [10w] + [10w] If you can't think of anything you should be grateful for,think that you can think and be grateful for that."

"What One Vulture Said to the Other I have a bone to pick with you ~which end shall we start on?"