#personal-development

"New Age Advertising ATTEND OUR REINCARNATION RETREATGuaranteed to be a once in a lifetime experience.Sure it costs $5000, but lets face it,you only live once."

"Seeing vs. Envision {Couplet} We see nothing more than we bring to it;heavenly orchards lie in an apple's pit!"

"Washington State Motto Al-Ki. [25]America's most rainy, PC and annoying state."

"Too Beautiful for Words [10w] + [10w] When nature presents us with miracles too beautiful for words,it is either a mountain, a beach, or a baby."

"In the Porn Industry [10w] Lacking a college-diploma's more than compensated by a humongous penis."

"Say No to Drugs Commercials The image of an egg sizzling in a frying pan is not your brain on drugs.It's just a fucking omelet."

"A-New-Year's-a-Comin' [10w] A new year is coming!Let's all make new mistakes!"

"Silly String [10w] Life' an absurdity radiating from a spine of silly string."

"Over-Douse [10w] Trying to mask death's smell,old ladies over-douse on perfume."

"Brewing Poetry Comma sips between the lines,insights percolate into a 10w,a latte sonnet here, a cappuccino couplet there.A few smartass epiphanies,and something new in every brew.One final fix,voilà, the poem is fixed!I adore this caffeine,that alchemises the extraordinary into the routine,and vice versa with the unforseen.It turns blue aquamarine,and words into Mexican jumping beans."

"Bonjour [10w] You're more obscure than first we met,"uttered with regret."

"Heart My heart jumps every time you walk through the door.It's not love.I have an arrhythmia."

"Busch Beer: Head for the mountains... [10w] ...and fall off the precipice shitfaced."

"Political Strategists Avoids the Controversial [10w] Politicians win by pandering to the base of shared assumptions."

"Mint Julep {Couplet} I've had more than a hint of a tulip or two,after treating them to a mint julep, or two."

"First Day at Harvard [10w] Smartest kid in the roomwalks into room of competitors."

"Poorly Hidden [10w] We're incapable of hiding arrogance, ambition or being in love."

"Optimists vs. Death [10w] Optimists are hopeful people who see a coffin as half-full."

"Frank Lloyd Wright {Couplet} Frank Lloyd Wright eliminated the confining wall,so now when your wife screams at youit sounds like you're in Tammany Hall."

"Ode to a Wastepaper Basket I love the way you sit in the corner,gracious like a lover,catching my every crumpled vanity."