#personal-development

"Who is Fortunate? [10w] Who is fortunate?He who measures his fortune in friends."

"Tangled [10w] Love becomes a tangle of roots submerged in common soil."

"Old People [10w] At the mere mention of death they gasp for breath."

"Somalia Haiku For a Somalian, heaven's drawing water from a well in an earthen pot."

"Lowbrows vs. Highbrows If you show something lowbrow to a highbrow does it wind up becoming crusty eye caca?"

"Cruel Love [10w] Cruel love helps turn out excellent,competitive, cutthroat, dog-eat-dog children."

"Fugly Fishmates For every woman that looks like a hatchet-faced haddockthere's an equally ugly flounder-faced man with even fewer prospects."

"Liberating Dreams [10w] God was with Joseph in prison.They escaped through dreams."

"La Récolteuse de la Mort Je suis la Récolteuse de la Mort et ~vous êtes ce que je viens pour les!"

"Predestination [10w] 'Twas predestined that I'd call predestination a crock of shit."

"That Jesus Kinda' Love [20w] What people do for the loveof their Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ,I wouldn't do for my fucking mother."

"Mongolian, Temeenii'malgai The small fuzzy hat worn by camels that cross the Gobi desert. Usually stolen by natives of Ulaanbaatar for the groom's hat at weddings. The fuzz on the hat smells so bad that the groom is temporarily blinded and can't see how ugly the bride looks until it's too late."

"Excuse The bureaucrat's excuse, 'If I have to make an exception for you,I have to make an exception for everybody else',doesn't apply to me because I exceptional."

"Nevada Haiku 'Happens in Vegasstays in Vegas', long as youpay hos to shut up."

"Poetry and Dogs [10w] Poetry and dogs make the best companions.Don't trust dogs."

"Jonesing [10w] Is it odd of me that I'm Jonsesing for strange?"

"Happiness [10w] Happiness resides in the quiet pause,not in the pursuit."

"Closets Opening and Closing [10w] + [10w] You can take sweet gay men out of the closet;you can't take the closet out of the master-bedroom suite."

"Flattery [10w] Flattery is the only passport that will get you everywhere"

"Knowledge vs. Wisdom [10w] + [10w] Knowledge is the understanding that you are what you eat. Wisdom is not eating a pussy with hair on it."