#positive-quotes

"Imaginary Friends When my childhood imaginary friend got mad at mehe insulted me by calling me 'real'."

"Bonjour [10w] You're more obscure than first we met,"uttered with regret."

"Telekinetic Poker Players Telekinetic poker players have a tell when they're bluffing:they always raise you."

"Pussy [10w] Her pussy was heaven's gate and the backdoor of hell."

"Marriage Material For women seeking a marriage partner,a man's sense of humor trumps good looks.Unfortunately for the funnymen out there,security trumps laughter."

"Elegance in Simplicity [10w] The more complex the problem,the simpler the correct answer."

"Privacy [10w] Why someone prefers his privacy is itself a private matter."

"The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side of the Hill That's because my lawn is on a south-facing slope of the hill and more more open to sunlight and warm winds. It's dryer due to higher levels of evapotranspiration than my neighbor's greener north-facing slope.I'm not the least bit envious of the color of his greener grass.I'm just pissed that the prick owns a better piece of real estate."

"Poetry as Entertainment [10w] Poetry that's not entertaining is just a self-indulgent laundry list."

"Sumerian Haiku Sumerian whoregrabs my wedge, says: 'I love aman in cuneiform."

"please=""hand=""me=""the=""remote,=""dear."=""[10w]=""The most effective method of birth control is grannie panties."

"Travel [10w] The difference between a traveler and vacationer is one arrives."

"Unconditional Love [10w] If you're not giving unconditional love,you're offering conditional hate."

"Dysfunctional vs. You're One Fucked Up Bitch [10w] "Causing pain's the only way you know how to love."

"Trickeries, Sophistries and Traps [10w] Life's great irony is that we, the trapped,set traps."

"I will always find a way and a way will always find me."

"Washington State Motto Al-Ki. [25]America's most rainy, PC and annoying state."

"A Moment Before Impact [10w] The deer's eyes were moonstones, reflecting back my car's headlights."

"Wheaties: Breakfast of Champions... who'll endorse any product for a price."

"Contiguous vs. Continuous Identity Identity's only preserved in death;in life it is ever-changing."