#positive-thinking

"Time is Not a Constant [10w] Time speeds up, crawls, compresses and expands depending on mood."

"Don’t Let the Dead Fish Fool You [10w] Even the eyes of a dead fish can reflect light."

"Marriage Material For women seeking a marriage partner,a man's sense of humor trumps good looks.Unfortunately for the funnymen out there,security trumps laughter."

"Bespeckled Heroes [10w] Great heroes in 100 years become statues speckled with birdshit."

"Pushkin When Pushkin came to Shovekin all hell broke loose."

"New Year Resolutions I [10w] Change my voice;unclog my ears;open my heart."

"2D or Not 2D [10w] The best thing about a two-dimensional world is nobody's fat."

"Past/Present/Future I have no problem living in the present,but because of my pastpeople want to kill me in the future."

"Imitation [10w] Art imitates life.Life imitates art.I just imitate imitation."

"Royal Pricks [10w] Woe unto the king of his bubble who's a prick."

"New Age Hype Don't 'honor your feelings.'Half the time they're full of shit.Don't 'embrace' anything without a pulse.Mindfulness should include not listening to quacks."

"What Might Have Been {Couplet} Dwell not upon what might have been,Within such idle spin, you can never win."

"Let's Face It [10w] If you've peed on enough fire hydrants, you're a dog."

"You're My Favorite' If you want all your children to know they're your favorite,give them all the same nameand whisper this confession in all their earswith the promise not to telltheir brothers and sisters."

"Focusing is the great secret of power. If you want to use your full amount of focus, you must close down all other thought and direct your power of generating mental steam toward one outcome."

"Love [10w] Love is a time machineset to your perfect present"

"Memory Foam [10w] She had an ass like an elephants memoryfoam pillow."

"CHOOSE WISELY'Birth wasn't your choice, and neither shall death be.But the way you live your lifeis your choice, buddy."

"Indiscernible Love [10w] True love's so effortless, others can hardly see it's happening."

"Scientific Discovery [10w] The greatest scientific discoveries were madelooking at the overlooked."