#sage-advice

"The 2-Step Self-Discovery Program The first step in self-discovery is not giving a shit what anybody else thinks.The second step is knowing you're a self-centered asshole."

"Kaddish Kaddish for Mrs. Ginsbergis not Kaddish,For your mom raised a Buddhistand mine raised a Jew.You'll zazen for your loss,I'll daven for mine.I do not belittle your loss,your grief is no less than mine.But by abandoning your tribe, אלון,Who now will say Kaddish for you?"

"Rooftop Poetry Sing poetry from rooftopslike a muzzein' s call for prayer."

"The Machismo Motto [10w] "When we are not hard as nails we get screwed."

"Stumble When you don't know how to end a sentence you've stumbled upon a truth."

"Eye of God [10w] The Hubble-Universe is a microchip in the Eye of God."

"Leaping lemmings! Leaping lemmings!I so adore ya'Can't get enoughJust want more’o'ya'!When I've had my fill'o'ya',I long for anotherRefill'o'ya.So, let's cut my spiel And here's the deal:I'm just gonna' haveta' cloneya'!So, when we're doneJust having fun --I'm just gonna' haveta' boneya'Again."

"Dangerous Food [10w] The world's most fattening foods are the ones you swallow."

"What happens when you trip China's Premier Li Keqiang on a banana peel? Your wind up with an even more slippery slope."

"What is Hate? [10w] Hate is merely love hiding behind the mask of envy."

"Small Packages [10w] Great things come in small packages from a geological perspective."

"Poets Hate Poets [10w] Poets hate poets who are more talented than they are."

"Marriage Material For women seeking a marriage partner,a man's sense of humor trumps good looks.Unfortunately for the funnymen out there,security trumps laughter."

"Genesis {Couplet} God spoke the world into existence, reifying an abstraction.Now the Creator's had second thoughts and wishes to utter a retraction."

"The Moon The moon's a pearl among the starry gems,more cultured than the rest of them.A blemished diadem of charcoaled nightthat chaperons the sun back to the light."

"Poets and their Thin Skins Every poet is thin-skinned when it comes to criticism ~without ithow could he ever possess the astute sensitivity about lifeto even write poetry?"

"Whose Asphalt Is It? [10w] The road to mediocrity is paved with asphalt and tarmac."

"Doldrums People who live in the doldrumscan't throw caution to the wind."

"Be Careful What You Wish For More often than not,a dream come true is a nightmare-in-the-making."

"Crest Toothpaste: Look, Ma, no cavities!... ...that'll really piss off the TSA agents looking for contraband."