#self-improvement-book

"The Human Race Pleasure is the sprint.Contentment is the 5 mile.Happiness is the marathon."

"Revel in the Unraveling Being authentic is lifting the maskon who you think you should be seen as,and becoming at ease with your bare ass vulnerability.Revel in the unraveling,take courage in sharing your imperfections,and you'llincrease your loveexponentially."

"How to Exercise Caution [10w] Walk in the counsel of the wickedon your treadmill."

"Happiness [10w] Happiness resides in the quiet pause,not in the pursuit."

"God vs. Satan [10w] Why can't God and Satan get along?They're both detail-oriented."

"Pacifism There's nothing like seeing action in war to turn a soldier into an instant pacifist or an instant killer."

"Missouri State Motto Salus populi suprema lex esto [16]If our chiggers don't getcha', Rush Limbaugh will."

"God is Great [10w] God found me in a dumpster and made me holy."

"Arches National Park, Utah BloodshotZiggurats of rock against unbending sky,sandstone fins and eyes of ancient earth behemoth.Your windows wedged by cosmic hands of rain and melting snow, of frost and ice, of gravity and geologic time, patient and untiring,self-possessed like a child's perception of endless summer."

"Argument [10w] Argue for the sake of resolutionnot for arguments sake.."

"What is God? [17] [10w] God has a fondness for cosmology and carbon-based life forms."

"Wishing Wells [10w] Wishes fall to the bottom of wells;only faith floats."

"In the Porn Industry [10w] Lacking a college-diploma's more than compensated by a humongous penis."

"Witticisms The greatest reward for coming up with some witty turn of phraseis that some day, if you're lucky,it may wind up in a fortune cookieat the very Chinese restaurant you're eating in!But if you get a big head about it,know it wasn't the flattery,it was the MSG."

"Ferdinand VII of Spain {Couplet} He who can false loyalty feignshall sit twice upon the throne of Spain."

"Memory Timeline of Divorce Divorce +1 year: "Just because we don't talk, it doesn't mean I can't stop thinking about you."Divorce +10 years: "The one good thing that came out of our marriage was our wonderful children."Divorce +20 year: "Who? Doesn't ring a bell."

"Grave Dancing for Dummies {Couplet} They danced at my grave when I was buried at sea;with my haters drowned, I'm now totally free."

"Selfie [10w] For the millennial generationa selfie is a family portrait."

"Kansas State Motto Ad astra per aspera. [9]Flat land and flatline intelligence."

"Love vs. the Three Headed Dragon In relationships, the corrosive venom of the three-headed dragon areindifference, fault-finding and 'take-each-other-for-grantedness'.Only these cantarnish the shining armor of amour."