Beryl Dov

"Carlsberg: Probably the best lager in the world... ...just like IKEA is the best furniture on earth."

"Creation "I shake my fist and there's bang.Stars sift like sand through my fingers;each swirl of my wrist a galaxy,every kiss imbued with a bit of me."

"Irish-Gaelic Wife-Fooking Proverb The truth can't be concealedI fooked your Caitlin from behind,because you can never plow a field by just turning it over in your mind.By the way, Caitlin's last words, before sucking me cock, were"Me husband's balls smells like ballyblue cheese, ahhhhhh, Éirinn go Brách!"

"Tangled [10w] Love becomes a tangle of roots submerged in common soil."

"The 3 Most Powerful Words in the English Language for Every College Student [3w] Ilovepizza"

"Is Prayer Only for Man? I [10w] Does God pray for His creation's in Heaven and Earth?"

"Posthumous {Couplet} The anonymous may claim their fame posthumous;But let my words be my stake, while I'm still awake."

"Soulmate My Ass [10w] Aspire to marry the person the least wrong for you."

"Love's Kiss of Death [10w] Love's kiss of death is taking each another for granted."

"Writer's Block [10w] Every writer's block is surrounded by a million other possibilities."

"Legacy To leave a legacy,you first gotta leave your leg in the door."

"Goose Neck [10w] Whenever a goose has a car accident, the traffic sucks."

"Bespeckled Heroes [10w] Great heroes in 100 years become statues speckled with birdshit."

"Owlish [10w] If owls are wise,why are they flat faced fucks?"

"Crying in the Rain If you cry in the raindoes anybody but you know you're unhappy?"

"Poet and the Fool {Couplet} {Limerick} The fool does his ego inflate,much like a poet does his oeuvre overrate.But the truth of the matter is that neither shit matters;harsh reality shall both nitwits deflate."

"Free Will [20w] A bunch of amino acids bumping up together is not the scientific explanation of free will, it's grilling a hamburger."

"Origami Master If you're the greatest origami master in the worldmaybe I can find you a job folding napkins at a restaurant.I'm not making any promises."

"Democracy, Really [10w] A democracy is free to replace one tyranny with another."

"Preparation [10w] Hope for the best, but prepare for your insufferable wife."