As an author, I like self-help, because clapping can be done... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE
"As an author, I like self-help, because clapping can be done by myself, for myself. I should buy gloves."
"As an author, I like self-help, because clapping can be done by myself, for myself. I should buy gloves."
"A can’t in a can—it’s carbonated failure that’s ready to drink. It tastes like the back half of love."
"The middle finger is a great body language tool for letting people know you’re upset. Poetry isn’t quite as effective in a fit of road rage."
"Hoping to win the lottery to escape your existence is like waiting on a unicorn to give you a ride out of town. If you’re interested, I’m selling saddles."
"I can’t use my intellect to figure out how to bypass my intellect. Love lies through the spirit, not the mind, and love never lies."
"Some men have actually died from laughing. That's so funny I fear for my own life."