More quotes by Jarod Kintz, It Occurred to Me

"In high school I got voted most likely to get voted for something. Even though I was the only one who voted, it still felt terrific being nominated."
"When a girl says she wants to be friends with benefits, I always ask if that includes dental insurance."
"In high school I got voted most likely to get voted for something. Even though I was the only one who voted, it still felt terrific being nominated."
"I love having a ceiling fan, although sometimes I wish he wouldn't cheer so loud when I'm trying to sleep."
"This morning my girlfriend was so loud in bed that we woke up the neighbors. So I told them to roll over and go back to sleep."