"Man has two legs and chairs have four, because we were made to stand out, not sit down—or be sat on. You are your brand—you are not a piece of furniture. Well, this applies to everyone except my grandma, but she’s dead, so she really doesn’t mind being used as a coat rack."
"Most scars are invisible. Damn transparent knives. Does anything cut deeper than love? I need to get some new body armor."
"Hide things everywhere. Forget about them. Find them randomly and feel surprised like a pirate finding buried treasure. Avoid scurvy. Love more."
"Blood may be thicker than water, but it's certainly not as thick as ketchup. Nor does it go as well with French fries."
"In a gust of guts and gusto, I told her of my love for her. Then, like a tornado, she spun what I said into something that terrorized Kansas."
"My heart is spinning. Love is a tornado. Will you be my Kansas?"