"She was washing all the dishes by hand, so I bought her a machine. I bought her a lawnmower. That’s what you do when you’re in love."
"The difference between a karate chop and a high five is the same as the difference between a knife and a paddle. My love can slice like a piece of pizza."
"Life, it’s made up of two things—time and love. A watch tells one, but what tells the other? We tell each other."
"Love is like whoa! Actually, it's closer to woe."
"Love is a green sky on a blue pasture, and I am the flying cow eating it all up."
"We fell in love like two medium pizzas in one large stomach. I wish dad would have saved a few slices for us."