"With a palindrome of a name, like Bob, I’d be both right thinking and dyslexic. Would you love me more as a Bob, or as a Bob?"
"Me: On time. Love: Late. Death: Early. Seriously, why are you late?"
"Love is like jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. But there’s no need to be frightened, because that plane is still on the ground."
"Love is like a portable lamp/sex toy. The world calls those flashlights, but I’m much more romantic."
"To love someone as much as you love yourself, that is the ideal. Especially if that someone is your clone."
"I don’t want to make love last, I want to make love second to last. The last thing we’ll do is cuddle."