#Dead

"Things can be funny only when we are in fun. When we're 'dead earnest,' humor is the only thing that is dead."

"when I become death. Death is the seed from which I grow."

"The dead do not hurt you; only the living do."

"The dead are way more organized than the living."

"A stick won’t stick to a wall, so why is it called a stick? Likewise, why aren’t love and ghost the same word? Both are dead and invisible."

"When I am dead, I hope it may be said: His sins were scarlet, but his books were read."

"That settles it, no more books about vampire before bedtime."

"One thing I would say is real cops have real gallows senses of humor and make incredibly funny and inappropriate jokes in the presence of dead people all the time."

"Sometimes dead is better"

"I’ve often wondered why more science textbooks don’t tell teenagers that the only thing sharks like to eat more than fish, are dead prostitutes."

"I think eulogies are wasted on the dead. It’s the living who need to hear kind words spoken about them."

"You gotta take chances in this life or you're alreadydead."

"O may I join the choir invisibleOf those immortal dead who live againIn minds made better by their presence; liveIn pulses stirred to generosity,In deeds of daring rectitude..."

"Pray for the dead and fight like hell for the living."

"The least I can do is speak out for the hundreds of chimpanzees who, right now, sit hunched, miserable and without hope, staring out with dead eyes from their metal prisons. They cannot speak for themselves."

"...the dead have a way of becoming saints in the eyes of their survivors..."

"Only the dead have seen the end of war."

"Don't kid yourself that you're going to live again after you're dead; you're not. Make the most of the one life you've got. Live it to the full."

"When I found him lying in the ditch holding a shovel, I thought he was sleeping on the job. Turns out he was being even lazier, and he was in fact dead."

"She’s ignoring my texts. Maybe she’s dead. Oh, I certainly hope so. I’d hate to think she’s being deliberately unresponsive."