#self-improvement-book

"Preparation [10w] Hope for the best, but prepare for your insufferable wife."

"Great Poets [10w] Great poets can milk blood and tears from a stone."

"Unruffled [10w] Nothing’s calmer than an unruffled duck eating a cool cucumber."

"Poetry Site vs. Social Networking Site [10w] Hello Poetry is whatever you want Hello Poetry to be."

"Vacations for Souls [10w] When souls are bored in Heaven they vacation in Hell."

"Let Others Speak [10w] When others speak of your virtues they grow tenfold."

"Hung [10w] Being caught with your pants down is a hanging offense."

"Don't Mess with the Queen {Couplet} The first man harnessing the secrets of fireCannot compare with the revelation of your sovereign ire."

"Prevailing Wins [10w] Truth prevails in private, bullshit in public, integrity in spirit."

"Penetrate the Mysteries "If you ever hope to penetrate the mysteries of the universe,you've got to buy her a drink first and then pretend you're listening."

"Transubstantiation [10w] Transubstantiate digression into confessionand drink from poetry's Holy Grail."

"Measuring Love The only scientist who can measure love is the onewho's in love with another scientist."

"New York Haiku "My monthly rent checkis more than you will make inyour fucking lifetime."

"Party Hat [10w] Circus clowns, Frenchmen, and sanitation workers look better in party-hats.."

"War [10w] When leaders threaten war,they’re breaking dirt on our graves."

"The Tigger Journals [10w] "Honestly, I'd rather be alone than with that unbearable Winnie-the-Pooh."

"What's Hot [10w] + {Couplet} We incorrectly assume what's hotis becoming what we're not."

"As Dead As "Nothing's changed at my place of birth.It is as dead as I remember leaving it."

"Prickly Pears [10w] Men are often like cactus fruits ~thorny outside,mushy inside."

"Lies vs. Truth [10w] I can only speak truth if I lie to myself."