Beryl Dov

"Sunshine On My Shoulders When you're home's always filled with sunshine,you're either blessed or it's time to fix the roof."

"Mind Maneuvers When we hear something unflattering,our mind doesn't fully process it.When we hear a compliment,the mind goes into overdriveand tend to read too much into it."

"The Wonder of Wandering [10w] When you wander without destination,the world becomes your teacher."

"Double-Dipping [10w] Double-dip in righteousness and delight in the here and herafter."

"Death Has Bad Timing Death has bad timingbecause rigor mortis sets into your penisjust when you don't fucking need it."

"God May Grant Your Wishes Daily [10w] Pray for sunshine at night and moonbeams when you wake."

"Lost vs. Lost We get lost twice in life.The first stems from uncertainty,when we try to find what our dreams truly are.The more profound feeling of being lost is existential, and comes unforeseen, after we finally fulfill our dreams.To survive the latter, we must create an entirely new set of dreams."

"Love Fades [10w] Like our love,Chinese painters show distance in faded grays."

"Athens, Texas Haiku Blackeyed Pea Capital of the World.Yup, just another shithole."

"Eckhart Tolle for Sociopaths The foundation for all abundance is having more cool shit than your neighbor."

"Animal Species Identity [10w] Funny how animals know their own species without a mirror."

"Enemies [10w] I prefer my enemies death than apologeticfor closure's sake"

"How to End Racism [10w] The children of interracial marriages should look like panda bears."

"Damn You, TripAdvisor! My penis deserves to be a World Heritage Site,judging by the number of tourists trampling on my balls."

"Visual Pun [10w] Example of visual pun:cloud shaped like a banana peel."

"Democracy, Really [10w] A democracy is free to replace one tyranny with another."

"Virginia Haiku "Bowl of chili for me.She'll have the Cheesy Western.Both with, add a slab."

"Russian, Umerzhurnalistka Someone who too many questions for his own good. Literally, 'Dead journalist'."

"Marriage Material For women seeking a marriage partner,a man's sense of humor trumps good looks.Unfortunately for the funnymen out there,security trumps laughter."

"Premature Evacuation [10w] I've stopped all my relationships short,not unlike this poem."