positive

"Charity [10w] Contentment over your life is the best aphrodisiac for charity."

"It so happens that at times your desires tend to disagree with the reality and this is due to the fact that you have not let the two elements complement each other."

"Please Don't Commemorate Me Just Yet [10w] The living are only commemorated when they're at death's door."

"Shakespeare vs. Keynesian Economics {Couplet} If 'Neither a lender nor a borrower be',investments would dry up, economies stagnate,and off to the poorhouse go you and me."

"Maintaining the Distance between Wealth and Poverty [10w] The nouveau riche are far more ruthlessthan the rich."

"What's Hot [10w] + {Couplet} We incorrectly assume what's hotis becoming what we're not."

"Grave Dancing for Dummies {Couplet} They danced at my grave when I was buried at sea;with my haters drowned, I'm now totally free."

"Affirmations are our mental vitamins, providing the supplementary positive thoughts we need to balance the barrage of negative events and thoughts we experience daily."

"Bagels and Lox Life's an everything bagel;love is a schmear of scallion cream cheese;and lox, no matter how you cut it,is resistant to dumbass metaphors."

"Overheard at Ashtanga Yoga Class *"I don't know my he left me. I even had a rabbit's food hanging from my dreamcatcher.""Maybe you should've used a little more suction and a few less amulets."

"Patience [10w] Patience is the most technologically advanced form of energy efficiency."

"New York Haiku "My monthly rent checkis more than you will make inyour fucking lifetime."

"Natural Born Killers [10w] After their first,every soldier becomes a natural born killer."

"Rebellious Fish [10w] Sometimes swimming against the current turns you into glazed salmon."

"The difference between being mediocre and achieving excellence is you."

"Jesus [10w] "Sorry to keep you hanging,but it's just our nature."

"If I Were God [10w] If I were God I'd sell my shit on Ebay."

"Even though your thinking might not be right for others, just so long as it's right for you then that's all what matters."

"Soup [10w] Never marry anyone who eats their soup with a ladle."

"Why I Don't Carry a Cellphone [10w] It's a sign of servility you can be contacted anytime."