positive

"If You Can't Think, You've No Right to Speak [10w] Our Constitution's guarantee of free speech specifically excludes fucking idiots."

"Jew in a Canoe Haiku Jew in a canoe,whitewater rushes, the canoe tips.The Jew doesn't."

"Every Small Child is a Miracle [10w] The God of small children is the one true God."

"Winning is great, but if it's not enough then then you'll never have enough!"

"When Old Age Begins Old age seizes center stagewhen more people we love are amidst the deadthan amongst the living."

"Spineless "How do you know which invertebrate lacks resolution if they're all spineless?"

"Problems are inevitable. Happiness is optional."

"Brewing Poetry Comma sips between the lines,insights percolate into a 10w,a latte sonnet here, a cappuccino couplet there.A few smartass epiphanies,and something new in every brew.One final fix,voilà, the poem is fixed!I adore this caffeine,that alchemises the extraordinary into the routine,and vice versa with the unforseen.It turns blue aquamarine,and words into Mexican jumping beans."

"Diamonds do not burst out from the mines into your hands. The universe, instead, will direct the men to discover the mines and find the diamonds for you."

"Enemies of My Enemies Who knew the enemies of my enemies were good dancers."

"Battered Women [5w] Battered womenare more crispy."

"The universal mind acts as an advisor or guide. When you abide by its advice then you will get another opportunity to alter your destiny."

"Free Will [20w] A bunch of amino acids bumping up together is not the scientific explanation of free will, it's grilling a hamburger."

"Barnum & Bailey Circus: The Greatest Show on Earth... ...when you can't afford Cirque du Soleil."

"Boasting vs. Toasting [10w] + {Couplet} What many call boasting to my success I call toasting."

"Poetry and Ostrich Feathers A poet should leave his poem covered with a faint film of fairy dust,inviting the reader to bring his faint heartand an ostrich feather duster to the reading."

"Kill Buddha's Hairdresser [10w] I'd like to meet Buddha's hairdresser and shoot the prick."

"The lesson will always repeat itself, unless you see yourself as the problem--not others."

"FBI vs. CIA When a person works for the FBI for 20 years and retires,he gets a watch.When a person works for the CIA for 20 years and retires,he gets watched.I know this not because I'm in law enforcement or with the NSA ~I know this because I have HBO."

"Tortuguer Costa Rica Haiku Lora Sea TurtlesInvade to beach to lay eggs.Locals invade the eggs."