positive

"Comfort Zone Your comfort zone has a clock on it, ticking off until it becomes your death zone."

"Government Intrusion [10w] + {Couplet} America's biggest illusion is the beliefthey're free from government intrusion."

"Rhode Island State Motto Hope.Not much here but at least we have Family Guy."

"Selfie [10w] For the millennial generationa selfie is a family portrait."

"Depression Busy people have neither the time nor the swimming skills to take a divein a pool of depression."

"Lubbock, Texas Haiku Oil wells, Hub of the Plains.Stinks like an armpit."

"North Dakota Haiku "My bib overallslook spiffy at a weddingor a funeral."

"Cookie Cutter Criticism A critic tried to fit my sense of humor in a cookie cutter,but it wouldn't fit his preconceived shape of what comedy should be.So he pressed harder, and harder and harder until the cookie cutter cut a cookie shaperight through the palm of his hand.It doesn't hurt anymore when the critic tries to slap me in the face.There's no more hot-air resistance."

"Kill Buddha's Hairdresser [10w] I'd like to meet Buddha's hairdresser and shoot the prick."

"Witchcraft vs. Wordcraft [10w] Covens of witches convened at their annual unconventional Coven’s Convention."

"When you act on your beliefs, the realisation that happens is caused by you and this will in turn lead to a consequence."

"Becoming [10w] We're a becoming whose final shape is unknown to all."

"No matter whether you believe in luck or chance, the final decision is from yourself."

"Shit Poetry [10w] Poetry without grace of expression is just so much shit."

"Nevada Haiku 'Happens in Vegasstays in Vegas', long as youpay hos to shut up."

"Income Tax [10w] A man's income tax return measures his integrity and stupidity."

"Pacifism There's nothing like seeing action in war to turn a soldier into an instant pacifist or an instant killer."

"The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side of the Hill That's because my lawn is on a south-facing slope of the hill and more more open to sunlight and warm winds. It's dryer due to higher levels of evapotranspiration than my neighbor's greener north-facing slope.I'm not the least bit envious of the color of his greener grass.I'm just pissed that the prick owns a better piece of real estate."

"Choose your thoughts and beliefs wisely.Be your own best friend, and not your enemy."

"Affirmations are our mental vitamins, providing the supplementary positive thoughts we need to balance the barrage of negative events and thoughts we experience daily."