Kevin Love has a last name that sums up my feelings for you.... - Jarod Kintz, The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink.

"Kevin Love has a last name that sums up my feelings for you. But then again, so does Renaldo Letsfucktonight."

"No matter how much water a sink takes on, it never lives up to its name. The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."

"He had a new girl, and I told him she looked like Marilyn Monroe. He smiled because he thought I meant she was beautiful, and I smiled because I meant she looked like a corpse."

"There’s truth and honor in a mustache. And that’s why I started flying one on the flagpole outside of my house."

"Like Alexander the Great and Caesar, I’m out to conquer the world. But first I have to stop at Walmart and pick up some supplies."