The trick to looking ageless is drinking 55 gallons of #Flas... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Let’s be romantic and dance in the rain. I’ll prove my feelings for you by bringing an umbrella, because I’m drowning in my love for you."

"The summer temperature outside was 45 degrees, so I turned 45 degrees and went right back inside. It was so cold outside because that’s where all her love for me was."

"Sometimes no words come as a response, only shapes spring to mind. But after you tell me you love me, I can’t very well reply, “Hexagon!"

"I have a lot of love to give, because free samples are the best way to encourage sales."

"I’d fight for your love like I’m Tyler Durden. I want you to hit on me as hard as you can."