#suicidal-thoughts

"Transubstantiation [10w] Transubstantiate digression into confessionand drink from poetry's Holy Grail."

"Who is Fortunate? [10w] Who is fortunate?He who measures his fortune in friends."

"Committees [10w] A committee sits in a rectangle and talks in circles."

"Minimum Wage [10w] Even trained bears couldn't bear working for bare minimum wage."

"Gypsy When one gypsy spits on you, its disgusting;when two do, it's suspicious;when three do, you're late to a gypsy wedding."

"Hate [10w] Love cannot hate eradicate ~only a more ruthless hate can."

"Kansas State Motto Ad astra per aspera. [9]Flat land and flatline intelligence."

"Myself [10w] "I don't really know myself;he's only a tenuous acquaintance."

"Compassion [10w] Compassion is the combination to enter the vault of heaven."

"Proof Proof of God's existence is as silly as proof of love's."

"Genocide [10w] Genocide is the runaway bride once death becomes the bridegroom."

"Cookie Cutter Criticism A critic tried to fit my sense of humor in a cookie cutter,but it wouldn't fit his preconceived shape of what comedy should be.So he pressed harder, and harder and harder until the cookie cutter cut a cookie shaperight through the palm of his hand.It doesn't hurt anymore when the critic tries to slap me in the face.There's no more hot-air resistance."

"Dsylıxǝa Hey, it isn't cool to make fun of people with Dsʎlıxǝaʎou dɯub pircʞ ¡!¡"

"The Dangers of Second Hand Smoke "Second hand smoke can be harmful becauseif you don't put out that fucking cigaretteI'm smashing your head open with this baseball bat."

"Life Imprisonment with No Possibility of Parole [10w] "The needle is preferable to three hots and a cot."

"Missed Childhood [10w] + {Couplet} Adolescence spent upon a cross,regrettably is childhood's loss."

"The Warrior's Way To the warrior,peace is an annoying interruption of war."

"The Poet as Enchantress [10w] + {Couplet} The poet is an enchantress,with or without a dress."

"Trance & Instinct The best poems come from trance and instinct;transcribing the unedited voice of universal consciousness."

"Leaping lemmings! Leaping lemmings!I so adore ya'Can't get enoughJust want more’o'ya'!When I've had my fill'o'ya',I long for anotherRefill'o'ya.So, let's cut my spiel And here's the deal:I'm just gonna' haveta' cloneya'!So, when we're doneJust having fun --I'm just gonna' haveta' boneya'Again."