relationship

"One of my main regrets in life is giving considerable thought to inconsiderate people."

"When she tried to seduce me, I got suspicious, thinking she was just after my massive fortune. Then I relaxed, when I remembered I'm poor."

"The words I love you form an oral floral phrase that's so fragrant it can overpower even the most flagrantly foul-mouthed utterance."

"To fast track your business and become the Roger Bannister of personal branding, be a connector, accumulator, accelerator and facilitator of relationships."

"My cat is ignorant of the law. But then so am I. That means I am not his master, because we are both slaves."

"For the funeral I needed a plus one, so I rented a hooker. And then I rented a movie. Rest in peace Grandpa, or whoever you were."

"Here was a boy who liked flaws, who saw them not as failings but as strengths. Who knew such a person could exist, or what would have happened if we'd found each other under different circumstances? Maybe in a perfect world. But not in this one."

"Ordinarily, I am the person who falls in love quickly and somewhat inappropriately and then goes on to destroy what is a good thing. That's always been my style. So, you know: I get it. And I feel right now the way I imagine all those guys felt with me. And I have to say, for the first time in my life, I feel something approaching compassion for them."

"So many events and moments that seemed insignificant add up. I remember how for the last Valentine´s Day, N gave flowers but no card. In restaurants, he looked off into the middle distance while my hand would creep across the table to hold his. He would always let go first. I realize I can´t remember his last spontaneous gesture of affection."

"They should make cell phones that are dishwasher safe. My cup runneth over—especially since both our drinks are in one glass because I’m too lazy to load the shotgun."

"You Can't Lose Something You Never Had"

"Your personal brand should be like water: not only clear, but transparent to the public. People thirst for that, and they will drink you up."

"First of all, never buy a man a plasma TV until you're married. A lot of men once they have a plasma TV they don't need a girlfriend"

"Two one-armed people might seem perfect for each other, but what if they’re both missing the same arm? Then even something simple like holding hands while walking becomes a case of they’re too similar to see themselves really going anywhere as a couple."

"Everyone disliked their partners at some time or another, she knew that. But she’d spent her hours in the dark wondering whether she’d ever liked him. Would it really have been so much worse to spend those years alone? Why did there have to be someone else in the room while she was eating, watching TV, sleeping?"

"Never marry at all, Dorian. Men marry because they are tired, women, because they are curious: both are disappointed."

"Don't leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and get it later; he may be with his real girlfriend."

"I love you,"he said, his voice catching. "When I thought you were going to die, I wanted to die."

"God is great and God is good,"Lisa says. "But where are the Apache attack helicopters when you need them?"

"I had a dream about you last night.. you were holding a pine cone and introducing him as Gerald."