#master-of-love

"Cormorant’s Flight [10w] The cormorant’s flight is the first shadow of the wave."

"Mmm Mmm Good Gimmick Campbell's Soup announced todayit's introducing 'QWERTY' soupfor our more computer literate children.Who are they kidding?They're just relabeling the old Alphabet Soup."

"Promising vs. Promises A promising life comes from a childhood without broken promises."

"Clairol 2: Hair color so natural only her hairdresser knows for sure... ...but he's gay and already Tweeted it to 300 people."

"A Poem Should Be Motionless A poem should be motionlessin its eternal truthsand animated to inspire latent words into action."

"Getting Real about the Eel It's not that eel wants to avoid commitment.From the eel's point of view, it is a matter of survival.Who the fuck wants to be with an eel anyway,when there are plenty of less slippery fish."

"Campbell's Soup: M'm! M'm! Good!... ...even though our products have more sodium than the Dead Sea."

"Miss Universe Contest Protest Haiku Fundamentalists protest Miss Universe contest.Go home, beat their wives."

"Lady Gaga Haiku A cow has a big head, deep voice, a long tongue, butLady Gaga he's not."

"Schmuck [10w] + {Couplet} Show kindness to a schmuck,it's guaranteed you'll get fucked."

"GPS for Sin "You've entered the point of no return;Re-cal-cu-la-ting."

"New York Haiku "My monthly rent checkis more than you will make inyour fucking lifetime."

"Embalming [10w] Injecting baking soda whitens, freshens, and softens the dearly departed."

"Death Has Bad Timing Death has bad timingbecause rigor mortis sets into your penisjust when you don't fucking need it."

"As Dead As "Nothing's changed at my place of birth.It is as dead as I remember leaving it."

"Nature's Prayer [10w] + {Couplet} Trees gesticulate in morning prayer;wind circulates with cleansing air."

"Diplomacy The diplomat's expert way of saying 'They should go fuck themselves' is:"We are agreed in principleand will take our minor differencesunder thoughful consideration."

"Informal HP Survey: Should Poetry Rhyme? O.K., readers, anybody who thinks poetry should rhymeplease tap your caneor jiggle your walker."

"Doldrums People who live in the doldrumscan't throw caution to the wind."

"Fashion [10w] Clothes makes the man.Fashion, above all, makes the President."