#relationships

"My Fathers Last Words My dad was a sadist and whorehound.His last words were,'Son, I have a million dollars hidden in the."

"Lowbrows vs. Highbrows If you show something lowbrow to a highbrow does it wind up becoming crusty eye caca?"

"NOT UNTIL I MET YOUNot until I felt your sunshine,Did I realize that I had been in the shade.Not until I saw all your colors,Did I realize that mine had faded.Not until I heard your dreams,Did I realize that I was still sleeping.And not until I experienced my life with you,Did I realize that I was barelyBreathing."

"Goose Neck [10w] Whenever a goose has a car accident, the traffic sucks."

"Pale Oak Leaves Scatter Pale oak leaves scatteraround my father's grave."For this I pay $30/month maintenance?"

"And then the line was quite but not dead. I almost felt like he was there in my room with me, but in a way it was better, like I was not in my room and he was not in his, but instead we were together in some invisible and tenuous third space that could only be visited on the phone."

"Pulling a Houdini Relationships are magic;we're always getting each other out of handcuffs and strait-jacketswhile locked in a steamer trunk underwater."

"I water fake plants, because I’m growing a garden of fake mustaches. Lest no man (or woman) question my ability as a lover."

"Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means."

"Don't Mess with the Queen {Couplet} The first man harnessing the secrets of fireCannot compare with the revelation of your sovereign ire."

"I fall in love with you four times a year: winter, spring, summer, and fall. The leaves may change, but how I feel about you does not."

"I mined my mind, and I found no love. My heart is where excavation yields gold, and if you dig me as much as I dig you, we can both get rich."

"First impressions are rarely worth preserving. Men typically fall short of our expectations."

"People die, I think, but your relationship with them doesn't. It continues and is ever-changing."

"I had a dream about you. We installed Dr. Robert Jarvik’s artificial heart in a mannequin and brought it to life, only to later kill it because a creature that’s all fake heart and no brain is what’s commonly called a “politician,” and must be destroyed."

"I’m older now than my dad was when he was my age. Wait, that’s not right. That’s not my dad at all, that’s just some stranger hanging around in my memory."

"Enmity Enmity is the soul of shit."

"Either I will love you, or I will love you if and only if you love me in return. I prefer the former."

"I'm tired of waiting by the phone, and second-guessing what a guy says and trusting someone not to hurt me. Again. I've been storming the relationship castle for fifteen years, and I still don't have my prince. I've got a bunch of battle scars from the field and I want to go home and nurse my wounds. I don't want to fight anymore."

"Err [10w] My dear, "To err is human — to forgive, to redefine."