Beryl Dov

"Rules of Etiquette [10w] Rules of etiquette are pretend manners for the lower classes."

"Mind Maneuvers When we hear something unflattering,our mind doesn't fully process it.When we hear a compliment,the mind goes into overdriveand tend to read too much into it."

"A Suicide's Regret "I cut my vein in vain;blood slowly oozes out.I should've cut an arteryand watch it spurt and spout."

"Penetration [10w] The difference between truism and an enlightened [10w] is penetration."

"Somalia Haiku For a Somalian, heaven's drawing water from a well in an earthen pot."

"Clairol: Does she or doesn't she... ...take it up the ass."

"La Récolteuse de la Mort Je suis la Récolteuse de la Mort et ~vous êtes ce que je viens pour les!"

"A Prayer God, be my light in pitch-black night;Show me the path from wrong to rightThat I might in Your hands be delivered later,Having eclipsed myself to become something greater."

"God May Grant Your Wishes Daily [10w] Pray for sunshine at night and moonbeams when you wake."

"Good and Evil To have good and evil the Devil must always remain a step beyond saving."

"Frivolous Gossip and Poetry It's just so much frivolous gossip to dwell upon the moral merits of a poet;what should only concern the reader is the merit of his words.Leave moral judgments to the preachers and aesthetic judgments to the critical readers."

"Missouri State Motto Salus populi suprema lex esto [16]If our chiggers don't getcha', Rush Limbaugh will."

"Broken Heart [10W] The broken heart becomes volcanic, forever rumbling anddispersing ash."

"Publisher's Persuasion "You're much too good a writer to want a six figure advance. You don't want your readers to think you're only writing for money ~ do you?"

"Vacations for Souls [10w] When souls are bored in Heaven they vacation in Hell."

"Kaddish Kaddish for Mrs. Ginsbergis not Kaddish,For your mom raised a Buddhistand mine raised a Jew.You'll zazen for your loss,I'll daven for mine.I do not belittle your loss,your grief is no less than mine.But by abandoning your tribe, אלון,Who now will say Kaddish for you?"

"Talented [10w] Being called talented brings with it more hatred than applause."

"How to Get Girls into Bed When I take a new girl out on a dateI tell them I slipped poison into their wineand the antidote is on my penis."

"Democracy, Really [10w] A democracy is free to replace one tyranny with another."

"Fate [10w] The eternal point where our dreams intersect is called fate."