humor

"I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability."

"Sometimes a scene may be about one thing, and it may end up still being about that, but the emotionality of it comes from somewhere else, or the humor of it comes from somewhere else, and it gives it that real-life quality."

"Holly's theory about the army,"Sharon explained.And what is it?"Denise asked, intrigued.Oh, that fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity."

"Who knew hitting my head and passing out would be so much fun?"

"I want the gift of a guitar—no strings attached. I want your love to also have no strings attached—and be just as musical."

"The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want for nothing. He makes me lie down in the green pastures. He greases up my head with oil. He gives me kung-fu in the face of my enemies. Amen"

"I've got a sense of humor. I'm a funny guy."

"If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere."

"I felt this awful obligation to be charming or at least have something to say, and the pressure of having to be charming (or merely verbal) incapacitates me."

"Jazz can be so serious, no sense of humor."

"The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another chance."

"Of course motivation is not permanent. But then, neither is bathing; but it is something you should do on a regular basis."

"molesting the vampire while he's too weak to fight back, iz? jace asked. i'm pretty sure that violates at least one of the accords."

"It's the idea that people living close to nature tend to be noble. It's seeing all those sunsets that does it. You can't watch a sunset and then go off and set fire to your neighbor's tepee. Living close to nature is wonderful for your mental health."

"I personally have dealt with any adversity in my life with humor. That's why I told America to 'Read my hips!' on 'Dancing With the Stars' or was happy to play along with Jason Alexander and Jerry Seinfeld in the great restaurant scene on 'Seinfeld.'"

"Married people should not be quick to hear what is said by either when in ill humor."

""Don't be scared of Bambi"the demon said. "She's only curious and maybe a little bit hungry."The thing was named Bambi?Oh, my God, the thing stared at me like it wanted to eat me."

"Rachel: You're a half-blood, too?Annabeth: Shhh! Just announce it to the world, how about?Rachel: Okay. Hey, everybody! These two aren't human! They're half Greek god!...They don't seem to care."

"Honest good humor is the oil and wine of a merry meeting, and there is no jovial companionship equal to that where the jokes are rather small and laughter abundant."

"Certainly, anyone whom I've witnessed, who has gone through something horrible and life-changing, has a sense of ironic humor, or an ability to look at the peculiarities of the world and find humor in it."