humor

"I'm not just a big-haired redhead country singer who dresses flamboyantly, has this wicked sense of humor and wears rhinestones."

"This emotion I'm feeling now, this is love, right?""I don't know. Is it a longing? Is it a giddy stupid happiness just because you're with me?""Yes,"she said."That's influenza,"said Miro. "Watch for nausea or diarrhea within a few hours."

"I got my sense of humor from my grandmother. You know, my grandmother was very funny."

"I consider myself to have a decent sense of humor. What's life without a sense of humor?"

"I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia."

"Jace suggested that the cast of "Gilligan's Island"could go do something anatomically unlikely with themselves."

"You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled."

"If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little."

"May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art -- write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself."

"Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so."

"It takes a lot of time to be a genius. You have to sit around so much, doing nothing, really doing nothing."

"You, Ms. Lane, are a menace to others! A walking, talking catastrophe in pink!"

"When humor goes, there goes civilization."

"Well, art is art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water! And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now, uh... now you tell me what you know."

"Pizza is circular. So is an hour. I’ll take two slices—to go."

"I am not absentminded. It is the presence of mind that makes me unaware of everything else."

"You humans, always eating. I'll make you soup. You can eat it while you keep working."Myrnin set aside his book and walked into the back of the lab."Don't use the same beaker you used for poisons!"Claire yelled after him. He waved a pale hand. "I mean it!"

"I'm a humor writer, so I don't always present myself in the best light."

"If you can understand the humor in the drawing part you'll probably get the humor in the audio part."

"Women should have nipples on their butts. From a design perspective, I think it would revolutionize the fashion industry."