humor

"MagicSandra’s seen a leprechaun,Eddie touched a troll,Laurie danced with witches once,Charlie found some goblins gold.Donald heard a mermaid sing,Susy spied an elf,But all the magic I have knownI've had to make myself."

"No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee; I have no interest in any of it. I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to."

"He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which."

"Hey, Carlos,"the Professor says when he walks in. "How was REACH?""It sucked.""Can you be more specific?"my guardian asks."It really sucked,"I elaborate, sarcasm dripping from every word."

"Women, as they grow older, rely more and more on cosmetics. Men, as they grow older, rely more and more on a sense of humor."

"With friends like me, who needs mannequins? My love for you is statuesque. Come, let us dance like we’re made of stone."

"Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess."

"Expand the definition of 'reading' to include non-fiction, humor, graphic novels, magazines, action adventure, and, yes, even websites. It's the pleasure of reading that counts; the focus will naturally broaden. A boy won't read shark books forever."

"Tasers are a one-size-fits-all paranormal butt-kicking option. Mine’s pink withrhinestones."

"Without humor, I cannot go on and I doubt many of my readers would go on either. Humor is so important. I am here to have fun here with my work."

"I don't have a caustic sense of humor. What I find funny, that humor comes from a much gentler place."

"Think about scary movies: There's a fine line between horror and humor."

"I’ll bet opening a store called Boobs and Books would increase literacy. I prefer a hands-on approach to learning."

"No one believes a liar. Even when she's telling the truth."

"I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: Oh Lord, make my enemies ridiculous. And God granted it."(Letter to Étienne Noël Damilaville, May 16, 1767)"

"My dad instilled in me a great sense of humor. I wasn't bullied at school because my outward attitude was confident, and that helps."

"Me and her, we’re both hiding who we really are. This is a common practice. It’s called dating."

"I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened."

"It's a funny old world."

"If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a non-working cat."