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"Let's Face It [10w] If you've peed on enough fire hydrants, you're a dog."

"Dull Poetry Dulls the Mind [10w] Poetry penetrates dullness when whetted on the stone of imagination."

"The Poet is God When a poem's words perfectly fit,it has legs.When they communicate well,it has a voice.When they make you think,it has a mind.When the make you feel,it has a heart.Think about it.When you write a poem,you've created a person,with a distinct identityand an immortal soulthat you send out into the worldto possibly change the world.Now you know what it feels liketo be God."

"Preserving Beauty [10w] + {Couplet} Preserving beauty is futile;even Cleopatra returned to the Nile."

"McDonald's I love and rescue stray dogs, duct tape Burger King crowns to their heads and set them loose in McDonald's."

"Mint Julep {Couplet} I've had more than a hint of a tulip or two,after treating them to a mint julep, or two."

"National Rifle Association Credo [10w] God gave us two hands to holdan assault rifle."

"Have faith in the universe and its capability to lead you to the path of abundance."

"New Year's Resolutions New Year's resolutions shouldn't be about doing new things;it should be about stopping to do the shitty things you're already doing."

"Stratospherical Poems [10w] Poets circle the earth in a higher orbit than readers."

"Argument [10w] Argue for the sake of resolutionnot for arguments sake.."

"The Poet's Limitless Imagination [10w] The stringy shit from my goldfish turns him into a kite."

"Origami Master If you're the greatest origami master in the worldmaybe I can find you a job folding napkins at a restaurant.I'm not making any promises."

"Now [10w] + {Couplet} Whether you Hurry up! or P r o c r a s t i n a t e,the NOW doesn't discriminate."

"First Day at Harvard [10w] Smartest kid in the roomwalks into room of competitors."

"When I was a child, adults would tell me not to make things up, warning me of what would happen if I did. As far as I can tell so far, it seems to involve lots of foreign travel and not having to get up too early in the morning."

"No matter whether you believe in luck or chance, the final decision is from yourself."

"What Teenage Boys Do On Their Computer All Day [10w] ctrl alt delete ex-girlfriendcut paste Penelope Cruzpost Facebook"

"Preachiness vs. Prose vs. Poetry A poem that says what it means is prose;if it means what it says it's a sermon.Leave the homiletics for the priestsprose for the journalistsand soulful resonancefor the poets."

"Consolation [10w] Man finds consolation in love, laughter and Ben & Jerry's."