#humor

"When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy."

"I do not,"I felt oddly appalled by her statement. "I'm an excellent liar. Ask my dentist. He swears I floss regularly."

"I had a dream about you last night... You tried to propose with a digital ceramic heater."

"She said she'd love me forever. That was two days ago, so I should probably ask her again if she still feels the same way."

"Some Semblance of Such "To lose one's identity to a Doppelgänger may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose multiple identities speaks of Nabakov."

"Frivolous Gossip and Poetry It's just so much frivolous gossip to dwell upon the moral merits of a poet;what should only concern the reader is the merit of his words.Leave moral judgments to the preachers and aesthetic judgments to the critical readers."

"Don't interrupt me while I'm interrupting."

"Adrian was easily distractible by wacky topics and shiny objects."

"Who knew that the devil had a factory where he made millions of fossils, which his minions distributed throughout the earth, in order to confuse my tiny brain?"

"Fashion [10w] Clothes makes the man.Fashion, above all, makes the President."

"When I dance, I’m so fluid you could drink my moves. And if you sip it with your morning coffee, you’ll be light on your feet all day."

"Basically, everyone thinks--knows--how sweet I am.Emma, you threw my sister through hurricane-proof glass."

"If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button."

"Simon: So were you following me? Or is it just an amazing coincidence that you happened to be on the roof of a building I was walking by when I got attacked?Jace: I was following you.Simon: Is this the part where you tell me you're secretly in love with me?"

"Let's carpe the hell out of this diem."

"Death [10w] What the the dying most resent is life goes on."

"Words of Wisdom [10w] Words of wisdom worth saying wouldfit on a T-shirt.@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@­:::::"

"Godshawk looked surprised, the way that people generally do when you ask them philosophical questions in shrubberies in the middle of the night."

"Whether you think you're right or you think you're wrong. You're right.""If you think in pictures, write. If you think in words, paint."

"Speak softly and employ a huge man with a crowbar."