#humor

"Money Can't Buy Everything [10w] Money can't buy everything ~ but love is certainly no exception."

"If I was on the road to Hell, at least I was going in style."

"Contiguous vs. Continuous Identity Identity's only preserved in death;in life it is ever-changing."

"What doesn't kill us makes us funnier."

"Elegance in Simplicity [10w] The more complex the problem,the simpler the correct answer."

"Holly's theory about the army,"Sharon explained.And what is it?"Denise asked, intrigued.Oh, that fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity."

"Life... is like a grapefruit. Well, it's sort of orangey-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have half a one for breakfast."

"Coffee Wisdom New Yawk [6] You either pay me the five large nowor yoos can choosebetween the toilet plungeror the hot coffee enemaya fuckin jamook."

"Any lustful fool can love a million women, but only a real man can love one woman cloned a million times."

"Predestination [10w] 'Twas predestined that I'd call predestination a crock of shit."

"I often wear camouflaged pants so when I walk I look like a floating torso. I love with the same air of mystery."

"I haven’t been feeling like myself lately. No, I’ve been feeling like my clone."

"I'm the Super-sized McShizzle, man!"Leo said. "I'm Leo Valdez, bad boy supreme. And the ladies love a bad boy."

"The longer and more carefully we look at a funny story, the sadder it becomes."

"Sometimes, there is no harm in putting off a piece of work until another day."

"Here,"Myrnin said, his voice still gentle and low. "Amelie said you had to work. No one said you had to work alone."He picked up the next part and slotted it in, took the screwdriver from Claire's numbed fingers, and fastened it with a couple of deft, fast movements. "I'll be your hands."She wanted to cry, because it was so sweet, but it wouldn't do any good."

"I used the boos, and not the booze, as motivation. That led to applause, which I drank up like an alcoholic. I need a refill."

"Welcome to the wonderful world of jealousy, he thought. For the price of admission, you get a splitting headache, a nearly irresistable urge to commit murder, and an inferiority complex. Yippee."

"Any fool can make a ruleAnd any fool will mind it."

"Who we were and who we are are four different people, and the me from now doesn't relate to the me from then, let alone to the you from now."