#humor

"It took less than an hour to make the atoms, a few hundred million years to make the stars and planets, but five billion years to make man!"

"Death should take me while I am in the mood."

"Exactly!"said Deep Thought. "So once you do know what the question actually is, you'll know what the answer means."

"Wedding Veil [10w] + {Couplet} A wedding veil's of no availbecause virginity's a fairy-tale."

"Wherever there’s a gathering of people, there is networking going on. My favorite place to network is the cemetery."

"Rules and school are tools for fools! I don't give two mules for rules."

"I deal in the ideal idea. Buy, sell, or trade, I am offering the best prices on Love."

"Coins [10w] Statesmen whose faces are on coins are amenable to change."

"I don't mean to be rude—"he began, in a tone that threatened rudeness in every syllable."Yet, sadly, accidental rudeness occurs alarmingly often,"Dumbledore finished the sentence gravely."

"See?” I’d whispered to Bones, nudging him with a grin. “He never argues with her. Isn’t that sweet?”A snort preceded his response. “Keep dreaming, pet."

"In middle school, I got picked on a lot. But boy, it sure felt good to get picked, because who doesn’t like to get chosen and called out as special?"

"Her name badge read: Hello! My name is DIE, DEMIGOD SCUM!"

"It has been well said that an author who expects results from a first novel is in a position similar to that of a man who drops a rose petal down the Grand Canyon of Arizona and listens for the echo."

"If you're going to make a science fiction movie, then have a hover craft chase, for God's sake."

"Whereas story is processed in the mind in a straightforward manner, poetry bypasses rational thought and goes straight to the limbic system and lights it up like a brushfire. It's the crack cocaine of the literary world."

"This isn't life in the fast lane, it's life in the oncoming traffic."

"Politicians [10w] All politicians serve two masters ~their ambition and their cocks."

"FEAR stands for fuck everything and run."

"Preserving Beauty [10w] + {Couplet} Preserving beauty is futile;even Cleopatra returned to the Nile."

"You can run from the grave, but you can't hide."