#humor

"Love may make you feel blue, love may make you feel green, and sometimes love may even make you feel turquoise or teal. Depression and envy get all the pretty shades of description, and I love that, but in a pink/purple kind of way."

"Leo: I'm almost out of gas! Woah, that came out wrong. I meant the burning kind!"

"Death and Famine and War and Pollution continued biking towards Tadfield. And Grievous Bodily Harm, Cruelty To Animals, Things Not Working Properly Even After You've Given Them A Good Thumping but secretly No Alcohol Lager, and Really Cool People travelled with them."

"Posthumous {Couplet} The anonymous may claim their fame posthumous;But let my words be my stake, while I'm still awake."

"I have detected disturbances in the wash.''The wash?''The space-time wash.''Are we talking about some sort of Vogon laundromat, or what are we talking about?''Eddies in the space-time continuum.''Ah...is he. Is he.''What?''Er, who is Eddy, then, exactly?"

"Foaly: Anyone see you come in here? Holly: The FBI, CIA, NSA, DEA, MI6. Oh, and the EIB. Foaly: The EIB? Holly: (smirking) Everyone in the building."

"Speak in French when you can’t think of the English for a thing--turn your toes out when you walk---And remember who you are!"

"These books can't possibly compete with centuries of established history, especially when that history is endorsed by the ultimate bestseller of all time."Faukman's eyes went wide. "Don't tell me Harry Potter is actually about the Holy Grail.""I was referring to the Bible."Faukman cringed. "I knew that."

"I was talking aloud to myself. A habit of the old: they choose the wisest person present to speak to"

"Gained in Translation [10w] In timeless truths there's more gained than lost in translation."

"So."[Isobel] cleared her throat. "What are we doing?""We,"[Varen] said at last, "are doing a project on Poe.""Didn't he marry his cousin or something?""The man is a literary god and that's all you have to say?"

"Yes, you need a passport to prove to the world that you exist. The people at passport control, they cannot look at you and see you are a person. No! They have to look at a little photograph of you. Then they believe you exist."

"I asked if she wanted kids. She said her clock is ticking. I said, That’s because I set it five minutes ahead when you weren’t looking."

"I make love with a focus and intensity that most people reserve for sleep."

"I’m on a government watch list. But I’m not interested, because government watches only work twenty minutes out of every hour."

"Soar Like a Pigeon [10w] Better be a pigeon than an eagle with Indians around."

"A goal without a plan is just a wish."

"Avery If a boy named Avery marries a girl named Avery,will they name or just label their children?"

"I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof."

"Poetry as Entertainment [10w] Poetry that's not entertaining is just a self-indulgent laundry list."