humor

"I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood."

"God helps those who strut their stuff."

"Really, I'm trying to care, Artemis, really. But I thought it was all supposed to be over when the fat lady sings. Well, she's singing, but it doesn't appear to be over"

"She says he says, but she could be lying to me, and he could be lying to her, so I can’t believe her, even if I could believe her."

"Relax, having kids is years away. But can you imagine? Your brains, my charm, our collective good looks... then add in the usual physical abilities dhampirs get. It's really not even fair to everyone else."

"I hate to think that all my current experiences will someday become stories with no point."

"Her name is Brienne,"Jaime said. "Brienne, the maid of Tarth. You are still maiden, I hope?"Her broad homely face turned red. "Yes.""Oh, good,"Jaime said. "I only rescue maidens."

"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it."

"A gun. I had been brought down by a gun. It was practically comical. Cheaters, I thought."

"Why do people say "grow some balls"? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding."

"I tried to go out for theater or theater arts, but I was too scared or too intimidated. But I had a lot of friends on the cross country team that had great senses of humor."

"What's great about the geek spirit is that life never seems to stop us, and they never seem to kill our enthusiasm, our optimism and our hunger to experience the world. We keep our sense of humor, we protect our dignity, we talk to our friends about the experience and then we start again fresh the very next day."

"The problem with doing nothing is that you never know when you're finished."

"I'm an off-the-charts introvert. To me, being around groups of strangers is exhausting. I've had to sort of train myself to think about two tactics: finding common ground and invoking humor."

"I’m a book lover. I’ve probably already fucked a whole library."

"You, Ms. Lane, are a menace to others! A walking, talking catastrophe in pink!"

"I wish there were more humor in my work than I see in it."

"I bought a faucet, but water wasn’t included. That’s like when you buy my love—it’s dirty and used, but soap isn’t included."

"Personally, I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught."

"Let’s be romantic and dance in the rain. I’ll prove my feelings for you by bringing an umbrella, because I’m drowning in my love for you."